You want the random? YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE RANDOM!

My friend Steve smoked a Magic: The Gathering card once.

One time I rented a video game for the SNES called Bubble Buster Bros. in hopes of playing with my dad. It ended being a one player game.

I almost cried in Lord of the Rings: Return of the King when Aragorn said, "My friends, you bow to no one."

In classic D&D rules there was a term called THAC0. Which meant To Hit Armor Class Zero.

I almost cried when I saw The Matrix Revolutions. I also almost had a brain anurism.

My girlfriend's first, middle and last names can all serve as first names.

The average penis is 6" long. The average vagina is 8" deep. There are about 2 miles of unused vagina in San Francisco alone. Go get some.

I remember I beat Mega Man X2 in 2 days, I bought it on the 1st of April and beat it on my birthday, April 3. My friends has just arrived for my party when I beat it.

Sometimes, when I take acid, I see Vishnu. He asks me for a Payday.

Denotation refers to the specific meaning of something while connotation refers to emotions suggested. Connotation makes the difference between Sad and Depressed, Hsppy and Elated.

Most people, when tired, find anything funny. When Thomas is tired, everything he says is funny to others.

My sister found out one of her coworkers has a Sidekick, it's his second. Thomas is on his second too. I'm on number four.

Al Gore didn't invent the internet. I did.

If you're watching a DVD and you notice a slight skip it's probably not a scratch. That's the DVD ROM lens adjusting to begin reading layer two.

Ken owes me money, but I don't think either of us knows how much.

Stewardess is the longest word in English you can type with only your left hand.

My sister's signature is a single word in cursive, her first initial and last name, in all non-capital letters. This spells lashton.

Nabisco actually stands for National Biscuit Company.

In Final Fantasy VII, The Enemy Skill, White Wind, restores the health of the entire party equal to the amount that is the difference between the caster's current HP and maximum HP.

The average american eats three spiders a year.

RacecaR

Once there was a keyboard layout called Dvorak where all the vowels were under your one hand and the five most common letters were under the other hand. Then outwardly from there, with the more common nearest your index, they letters would get less and less common. This typing style was so fast they made the little stamps in typewritters lock together, so they were returned to the "qwerty" configuration. "Qwerty" was then adopted of course by the computer keyboard. You can still set your keyboard to Dvorak though, if you like.

All bugs are insects, but not all insects are bugs.

I am 1/8th chinese.

I believe Fabio said it best when he said, "I can't believe it's not butter."

Chinese and Japanese use characters to symbolize their sylables. Of course some words are single sylables and some are polysylabic like English, but polysylabic words are usually constructed with monosylabic words that are related to the compound word. This may sound similar to English compound words like "trainwreck" and "playstation" but this is not so. For example, in Chinese, Dong is "to move" and Wu is "thing" and Dong-Wu is "animal."

Why are there so many names for a period?

Thomas fights like Nali.

Blog is derived from the word WebLog.

Most people I know don't memorize phone numbers, instead they memorize the movement their fingers make over the keypad as they dial.

If anyone can tell me what the Interstellar Pig actually is/does, I'll send them $1 through Paypal.

If you shove food up your ass, you'll shit out your mouth.